If I look back, I find myself the most frustrated, angry and short tempered with my parents. I really have no idea where it stems from, but I do know its a problem. I could tell you it came from my parents not going to a single one of my sporting events. Or that I always felt inferior to my sister because it seemed that my parents were more proud of her accomplishments than mine. Maybe its the fact that I feel like my dad belittles me, and treats me like I don’t know anything. Or maybe because my mom always thinks that I’m at fault for whatever situation I am in. I could say all of this has shaped my life into the who I am now. But that would be a lie! My life is what I make it. And I choose to live my life more like Christ. The truth is, maybe I haven’t forgiven my parents for all the things that “I feel” like they have done to me.
My senior year in high school was probably the hardest time in my life. I had friends betray me, almost flunked out, and had truancy filed against me. My friends chose to go behind my back and keep secrets from me, Like that one of them got my ex-girlfriend pregnant. School was another story. I had a care free attitude and would skip class every chance I could get. Maybe that was from what I was walking through with my “friends”. Whatever it was, I was dealing with something and wasn’t going to tolerate anyone else.
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgive each other, just as Christ God forgave you.” – Ephesians 4:31-32
How can God forgive you if you cant forgive others? My past and all the things I have walked through don’t define me. I could be mad and hate everyone who has done wrong to me, but I choose to love as God did. we will never forget, but we can always forgive. Forgiveness softens the heart and leaves room for God to move in your life, and in theirs. I could hold those things I said about my parents against them, I could feel second to my sister in everything, or let my parents get to me by what they say. See, the thing is, we are called to so much more, to greater things. Seek God in everything, and watch him move.
“Understand this, my brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. Human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.” - James 1:19-20